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  In less than a month, a now grown Caelan was scheduled to visit his mother and he was bringing along Nisey, his slave. In fact, not only was Caelan bringing along his own slave, he was also bringing his half-sister, Kalinda and her Doms, Josh and Dominic to Ireland for the holidays. He hadn’t been surprised when Caelan had called him to get his opinion on the matter. In fact, it had given him a sense of pride when Caelan had sought him out in dealing with Myrna. His fear of upsetting his mother or losing Nisey had put the younger man in a bit of bind. Amery hadn’t hesitated to tell Caelan to quit hiding his true nature from his mother. He was a grown man and his mother would have to accept that fact. He’d been pleased when Caelan had taken it to heart. Not only would Nisey finally get to meet Myrna, which had been a bone of contention between her and Caelan, but it also pushed Myrna back into the lifestyle she’d scorned for so long – and hopefully shoved her right into his waiting arms.

  In a few very short weeks, just in time for Christmas, Myrna’s small home was going to be over-running with the one thing she’d shunned for the past thirty years: BDSM and her own buried need to submit. As he’d expected, she finally turned to him for help but sooner than he’d anticipated. He had less than a month to reawaken Myrna’s slumbering submissiveness. The anticipation of fulfilling his long repressed desires had his blood simmering. He was just the man to remind her of what she’d buried when Grant Doherty had so cruelly walked out of her life for a younger submissive.

  “Are you sure this is what you want, Myrna?” Even though it made him rather uncomfortable, he had to give her one last chance to escape the fate awaiting her.

  An impatient sigh was her response. He knew if he’d bothered to look at her, she was more than likely tapping her toe. A smile tugged at his lips at the thought.

  “If I didn’t think I needed your help, I wouldn’t have asked, Alastar. I’m not a naive sub asking you to train me, nor am I asking you to take me on as a submissive. I simply don’t want to go to the clubs by myself. I’ve been out of the scene for a long time and the possibility of someone mistaking my motives for being there is great.”

  He finally turned to face her. He’d been right, not a hair was out of place despite her obvious discomfort. “So let me get this straight. You want me to take you to the clubs, protect you as you become reacquainted with the scene, while at the same time realizing there’s no chance in claiming you?”

  She nodded while relief filled her face with a becoming pink tint. “You have to realize, Alastar, there’s no other I trust as much as you. I doubt I’ll ever want another Dom to claim me. Besides, I know you’d never allow anyone to hurt me or become overly aggressive while I try to adjust to being around the lifestyle after being gone for so long.”

  He tapped his fingers against his thigh while he tried to deal with the naivety of the woman in front of him. “Either you’re in serious denial, m’gnogag, or you credit me with more self-control than I deserve.” For the first time in several years, he allowed his hunger for her to become apparent. Her cheeks grew more flushed as she realized his undampened ardor.

  “Amery?” Her voice caught in her throat.

  The fact she was using his first name he attributed to the fact she was uncertain of how to respond, plus that he’d surprised her with his blatant hunger. A fizzle of satisfaction coursed through him. Good, I want her to realize while we’re still friends, I want so much more for and from her.

  “Why are you so surprised, Myrna? I haven’t been subtle about the fact I find you attractive. Nor have I hidden the fact I want the submissive woman I know is still alive under all those barriers you’ve tried to place between her and me. It’s been almost thirty-three years since the stupid arse Doherty bruised your submissive heart.”

  He gave a soft, cynical laugh when a whimper escaped her as she instinctively took a step back. “Again, why am I not surprised? Because any time I mention the possibility of a Master-slave relationship between us, you run away just like a timid little luch.” His words had her back stiffening. She hated when he lovingly referred to her as a timid mouse. He knew he’d basically called her out in a way he had never done before. Waiting for the coming explosion, he crossed his arms over his chest. He fully expected her to rail at him about how she was a victim. When she stayed silent, he realized he was going to have to push just a bit harder.

  “Quite frankly, I’m tired of it. I’m not getting any younger, Myrna. I’m ready to enjoy my retirement and I want to enjoy it with you. But I’m not in the market for a submissive who can’t accept her very nature, but instead hides behind her grown son.” He kept his satisfied smile hidden when her hand on the door handle tightened until the knuckles turned white. Almost there…just a bit more and she’ll come out from behind the wall she’s built to blast me good and proper.

  A frown crossed her face before she met his gaze with her own. For a moment he thought he glimpsed the sheen of tears in her eyes, but when she propped her hands on her full hips, he thought he must’ve been mistaken. Her vivid periwinkle blue eyes were snapping with barely leashed fury while her plump raspberry-hued lips pressed into a firm no-nonsense line.

  “You arrogant, dominating bastard! I ask for a simple favor as your friend, but no – you’ve always got to have everything your way despite who’ll end up hurt!”

  Her hissed response had him stepping towards her. He watched with narrowed eyes as she held her ground. Good, she’s not scared of me. That’s a start. It had broken his heart when in the past she’d flinched every time he’d gotten near. He stopped mere inches from her, close enough to inhale the familiar scent of butterscotch she’d been sucking on.

  “I’ll never hurt you, Myrna, but I’ll always be the dominant in our relationship.” His hand lifted to cup a cheek. “I won’t apologize for it either. I want you. I’ve made no bones about that, but I can’t do what you ask. The temptation is too great. If we do this, it’ll be with the purpose of pursuing a true Dom/sub relationship between us; not because you want to use the occasion as a convenient shield to see if you can handle the reality of our lifestyle.”

  He watched as her eyes fluttered closed, with what he was sure was denial. His inner Dom reacted – angry at the thought she would try to hide from him.

  “Open your eyes! I will not allow you to hide from this!”

  She jerked as if she’d been struck as her eyes flew open. Deep in their blue depths he could see the longing she was trying to bury under her anger. His finger traced idle patterns across the soft skin of her face.

  “There is no shame in wanting to submit to me, m’gnogag.” A deep sigh escaped him. “What I wouldn’t give to turn your sulky little pouts into screams of pleasure.” He rubbed his thumb over the upper bow of her lip before tracing her lower lip. “Let me show you how it’s supposed to be between a Dom and his submissive. How a true Dom treats – how I treat a woman who entrusts me with not only her body but her happiness. If you do, by the time Caelan comes home, you’ll remember why his woman submits to him and be happy for them. All you have to do is take the chance, sweetheart.”

  While her eyes misted over, he watched her struggle with her overwhelming fear warring with her deeply denied need to submit. A low growl built in his chest when he saw the fear win over her need. Damneigh, she was so close!

  “I…can’t…I’m sorry, Amery, but I can’t.” She slowly stepped back as if she were afraid he was going to strike her. After what happened with Grant, he understood the fear but he didn’t have to like it. He watched as she turned to scurry out of the study.

  “Run little luch as fast and far as you can, but just remember I’ll be there when you finally stop.”

  She stilled before looking over her shoulder at him. The determination in her eyes didn’t surprise him.

  “If it means giving control of me over to a man again, I’ll run forever.”

  He shook his head. “With Caelan returning home, you’ll stop sooner than you think. Just remember my offer still stand
s.”

  His heart went out to her when her shoulders straightened. He could see her gathering herself as she left the room. When will she realize she belongs with me? He raked his hand through his hair before turning back to face the window. A deep sigh escaped him. There was nothing else he could do – the ball was in her court. Now, all he could do was wait. A humorless chuckle escaped his suddenly tight throat. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have plenty of practice. He was always waiting on that woman.

  Chapter Two

  Steeling herself, Myrna paused as her hand landed on the interior door to the main floor of her former club. It’d been over a week since she’d walked away from Amery and his offer. It was because of him that she was standing on the threshold of the club where she’d once given everything to Grant, despite her vow to never return there. If he hadn’t been such a dominating arse, she wouldn’t be here by herself. Why couldn’t he have just said yes?

  She jumped when a leather-clad bouncer pushed opened the door to inquire if she was lost. His chestnut hair was all one length as it brushed his shoulders. While he was massive - his body filling the open doorway, his blue eyes shone with kindness. Out of nervousness she lifted a hand to tuck a wayward tendril which had escaped the long braid hanging over her shoulder.

  “No, I was…” Her voice trailed off as she looked into the interior of the club. More specifically, she saw the reflection of the full-length mirror hanging behind the bar. She almost didn’t recognize the mature woman in dark leggings topped by the long-flowing, cream-colored poet’s shirt with her graying hair pulled back severely from her heart-shaped face. Is that actually me? Damn, when did I get so old?

  “Ma’am, are you all right?” The faint hint of concern in the younger man’s voice broke the thrall the mirror had on her. She mentally gathered her defenses around her.

  “I’m not sure but…” She took a deep breath. “I’m a former member and I wanted to see…” A flush rushed over her ivory skin.

  “…you wanted to take a trip down memory lane?” The bouncer’s helpful reply had her nodding despite the fact this was the last place she’d want to revisit in her memory lane. She couldn’t believe she was actually standing here.

  She briefly wondered what Amery would think if he knew she’d finally gathered up her courage to enter Sanctuary’s Lair, not just his home away from home, but also the club where her ex had been a founding member. Would he applaud my bravery? Truth be known – she wasn’t feeling brave – she was petrified. She never would’ve forced herself to come here all alone if Caelan hadn’t called this evening. She’d panicked at the idea of hurting her son and had jumped in with both feet. Instead of hiding in her small cottage, she was foolishly plunging into the one thing that scared the hell out of her. She wasn’t brave at all – just foolish. Come on - be honest with yourself, Myrna Doherty! You’re not just being foolish. You’re still hiding, not just from your own submissive nature, but also from your longing to be owned by Amery.

  “Your name, Ma’am?”

  She forced her attention back on the bouncer. Dammit! I have to stop this before he thinks I’m a loon.

  “Myrna. Myrna Doherty.” She waited with familiar dread pooling in her stomach while he checked her name against the palm-held computer in his hand. What if my membership has been completely revoked? I haven’t been here since before Grant walked out. What if the arse took me off the membership roster before he took off for America?

  A couple clicks later and the man looked up with a grin. “This way, slave. One of the Masters will want to speak with you before you may go out on the floor.”

  She swallowed rapidly before voicing her protest. “But…I just wanted to sit at the bar. I wasn’t planning…”

  The bouncer patted her shoulder. “It’s for your own safety, Mrs. Doherty. You’re an unclaimed submissive. Not to mention it’s been several years since you’ve visited Sanctuary’s Lair – things have changed a bit.” He wrapped a gentle hand around her upper arm before guiding her through one of the doors she hadn’t noticed off the main floor. Her heart threatened to burst out of her chest when the young man turned and left her alone in the room after assuring her Master Simon would be with her shortly.

  Licking suddenly dry lips, she stood alone in the middle of the well furnished room. What the hell have I gotten myself into?

  The time dragged by torturously slowly while she waited for Master Simon to appear. When he finally did, she realized it’d only been ten minutes, even though it had felt more like ten hours to her already over-wrought nerves.

  “Good evening, sub.” The deep timber had her jumping. She tightly clenched the clutch purse holding her keys, driver’s license, and bank card before turning and facing him. Shock washed over her as she recognized the blond man standing before her. The gangly frame she’d remembered was gone. He was just as tall but his body had filled out. He was no longer the young man who’d been receiving his novice training under Amery. He was now a man in his prime and held the self-confident air any Master would have – including her son. Dear Lord, how time flew. It made her happy to see the promise Amery had seen in the younger man had been realized.

  “Master Simon. It’s nice to see you again. It been years, but I do remember meeting you during your training.” She chuckled at the surprise in his eyes. “Although I’ll have to say the years have been kinder to you than me. I can see you’ve lived up to the potential Master Alastar saw in you.”

  The younger man’s face flushed with pleasure at the compliment. “Master Alastar is the best. We wouldn’t know what to do without him to guide the ‘newbies’.” He settled into the chair before motioning her to his side. Fear had her freezing as she realized he was waiting for her to kneel at his side. Her eyelids flickered before she forced her feet to move. Get a grip on yourself, Myrna. It’s not as if you’re submitting to a man half your age. It is a simple gesture of respect. She was just getting ready to drop to her knees before him when he stopped her.

  “There is no need for that, sub. I don’t stand on formality in this room.”

  That’s when Myrna noticed the small upholstered bench half hidden by the shadows of the high backed chair. Relief rushed over her so fast she was surprised she didn’t feel light-headed. Sinking down on the bench three feet from the chair, she waited for him to speak.

  “I understand it’s been more than several years since you’ve been here. A few things have changed - most of them for the better. This is a club where the members either are unattached while being trained, or are part of a committed relationship. As such, we’ve had to enact a few new rules to avoid confusion.”

  She nodded. “That’s understandable. So what do I need to do, Master Simon, to keep from being mistaken for a sub looking for training? I merely wish to revisit a part of my youth.” Keeping her voice even, Myrna sat still as possible, while she waited for his answer - hoping against all things sacred he wouldn’t see the lie for what it was. At his continued silence she grew nervous once more. Is he angry at my forwardness?

  Before he could answer her, the phone sitting on the low table between them rang.

  “Excuse me for a moment.”

  She nodded before tuning out the conversation he was having. Evidently not all my habits died when Grant left me. I can’t believe how easy it is to fall back into routines I haven’t used in years. It’s almost as if I never left. Or perhaps it’s because I know with Amery’s training, Simon is a Master of integrity?

  “Thank you, Sanders. I’ll prepare her.” The gentle click of the phone in its cradle brought her back to their conversation. She glanced up at him expectantly.

  Master Simon stroked his chin thoughtfully before meeting her gaze. It felt rather disconcerting considering that she’d been trained to always keep her eyes lowered in the presence of a Dom. “Interesting. What makes you think that you’ll be mistaken for a sub looking for training instead of a collared sub?”

  She cocked her head. “If I were collared, I w
ould not be here alone.” The drumming of his fingers on the arm drew her attention as unease filled her. “Have I angered you with my assumptions, Master Simon?”

  He shook his head. “No, Myrna, you haven’t angered me. It just leaves me in a bit of a predicament. That was Sanders, the security guard who brought you in. It seems possible that while you may think that no one has a claim on you, there is the very real probability that someone does.”

  Confusion swamped her. “Predicament? How could it…” She finally grasped the rest of his response. “I assure you, I’ve been un-collared for many years, Master Simon.”

  “I am aware of your past with Master Grant. Frankly speaking, Myrna, I find it highly disturbing even after all these years - what he did to you – no sub deserves to be blindsided like that. In fact, after what happened, your membership was put in what everyone assumed was a temporary status, which would’ve been removed after you had healed and decided to return to the lifestyle.”

  Her eyebrows rose. “I don’t understand, Master Simon.”

  “It’s quite simple, Myrna.” She heard the familiar voice of the man she’d been trying not to think of and had spectacularly failed. Amery Alastar was behind her. Relief warred with anger when she looked up to find him closing the door behind him. He was dressed in his leathers with his silver hair brushed back from his face. The aura of dominance surrounding him had her breath catching and her heart racing. Desire to submit to him warred with genuine anger. He was never at the club on Thursdays – that’s why I took the chance on coming today. I wasn’t expecting to see him here. The only way he knew I was here is if he’s had me followed.